01 January, 2009


it's half two a.m. in 2009. to me, it feels like 2009 has been on the verge of being here for ages already. i'm so done with 2008 and so ready for 2009!

2008 was solitary, stationary, predictable and solemn, slow and mundane and all manners of intrusive.

2009 is on the verge, exciting and new, thoughtful, exciting, entrancing, enriching, fun, joyous, happy and right and the year of thriving.

i could do a lovely blog like kimmi where i list all of the wonderful things about all of the people closest to me, but i don't feel that's the right thing for me to do at the end of this particular year. i'm not sure what the right thing is, completely, though. i'm not even sure what the right course of action (besides waking up) for tomorrow is! i just know it's a new year and i'm ready to live.

i have so many dreams and plans and thoughts and ambitions i had set aside and put on the back burner in order to "endure school and life" when i started working toward my aa degree a couple years ago. all of those things have been rejuvenated. i have God, and my family to thank for that.

God has put such a quickening in my spirit the whole ending of 2008 i feel like i've just been on the verge of 2009 and bursting my way into it the whole way. i feel ready to take on the world and the plans He has for me, the church and the world soonsoonsoon.

my family is such a strength and support to me. nothing life-altering has happened too, too recently. (though within last year many events did take place) but i think this year i just especially feel close to them all in a new way. i'm excited to be growing up alongside such incredible people. even though they see me with crazy morning fringe, no make-up and sometimes a bad attitude they somehow still love me. it's incredible and i don't deserve them at all but thank God daily for their presence in my life.

all of you lovely kids whom i met on the www this year, you've all had a huge part in my life this past year, also. you've seen me through crazy ends of my paper days, ends of community college and the beginnings of my new university. you've all put up with my changingness in how often i'm around and the mood i'm in when i am (which is generally half asleep.) we've had our ups and downs, our bumps in the road and our moments of divine understanding of one another. in the end, however, we've also seen each other through some tough times and some amazing ones. i hate lists because i know i'll forget someone not meaning to and feel awful. just know i love you all veryvery much and i wouldn't be who i am today without each and every one of you. thank you, all of you, for not forgetting about me. <3 br="br">
i'm so thankful for all God has given me in the past year. i am so abundantly blessed, i don't even know where to begin! so pardon this random, hay-wire blog, but i needed somehow to get all the people on my mind out and onto paper/screen.

my eyes hurt immensely and i'm just glad i made it home alright. there are so many crazies out on the road right now and it's sure to continue on into the morrow . . .

i'm in such a pensive mood, i don't know how to stop. i also don't know how to say all the things i'm pensive about. nor do i feel them appropriate as of yet or that you should know of them, yet. i'm listening to max richter and he makes my brain spin with thoughts of distant lands and dreams subtle in their appearance and vivid in their emotion.

one thing i want to do in 2009 for sure is i want to taste colour. i'm determined. tell me i'm crazy, i won't deny it! but taste colour i will. and not just in the form of really red tomatoes or sharper than sharp yellow corn.

mum is asleep with a horrible headache and has to get up for work in three hours. i think i'm going to head in that direction myself. thank you all for being a part of my life in 2008. thank you also for wanting to stick around in 2009. it means so very much to me. if you'd rather not stick around, though, you still have a whole day to back out! after the first, however, you're kind of committed.

i don't know what else to say except, "omw, ilyall!"

xxx mal


Bitte gib mir nur ein Wort said...

Lovely. And the German auch.=]

Alex"Westside Productionz" said...

have a great 09 :)
happy new year!